Post by Schmergo on Jun 30, 2007 9:33:21 GMT -5
I only use the neoboards on neopets, and only during the summer.
Well, it's summer, and guess what I've been doing?
Here are the contents of a board called "I Am Snape, The Potions Master." I am the purple letter, and I was trying to convince people that I was Snape:
Hellllooo, children.
I am Severus Snape.
No, really.
Now turn to page 394, or I shall school you in the subtle art and exact science of detention. Don't MAKE me drip my greasy hair on you.
Let's go bother Snape!
Right-O!
BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER!!!
No! Don't bother me! I shall prod you with my large and freakish nose, you naughty child!
god and that james kid douted I was sane
What bout u!
Hehehehe. BOTHER!!
JAMES?! Did you say James? DO NOT MENTION JAMES "THE WALRUS" POTTER.
Detention, Miss Rad_glow_stixz! You must write fifty time, "I shall not be a twit!" Now brew me a Forgiveness Potion and I may have a modicum of mercy for you.
yay and im paris hilton oh get a life
Sit down, Miss Hilton. I do not tolerate talk like that in my classroom.
SoooOOOooOOO, d0es any0ne kn0w what p0ti0n is created by an inf00sion of asph0del and w0rmw00d?
What? I can be a 1337 professor if I like. Stop smirking or I shall be forced to berate you severely with a cactus.
YAy! sonic is here to save us!!
Sonic? I do not allow hedgehogs in my classroom. Unless I am dissecting them for a potion. If this "Sonic" does not wish to be part of a potion, tell him to vacate these premises at once.
NOBODY TALKS TO MY HEDGEHOG LIKE THAT. I OUGHT TO SPLIT YOU IN HALF AND EAT ALL YOUR INSIDES. I OUGHT TO RIP OUT YOUR HAIRS SLICE OPEN YOUR HEART, TAKE ALL THE ICKYNESS OUT AND FILL IT WITH YOUR GRIMY GREASY HAIR!!!
Oh Sanpe, I know what you did last week...
Really, Miss Murdocobsessedmaniac? What did I do last week?
I know what you did last week. You failed my exam, that's what. DETENTION.
I was hiding under your bed, youre disgusting by the way. And isnt it abvious your supposed to call me 'Stalker'? Dont make me get the owner of my soul in here.
no.
I HATE SNAPE!
How dare you, Miss Kitkatluvr? I don't need to be a Legilimens to hear slanderous talk like that, and I am frankly shocked.
Do not make me force you to drink this WEASELS STUCK TO YOUR FACE POTION.
LMAO!
OOoooh, Snapey! *pulls out wand* avadacadavra!
AVOCADO-CADAVER!
Mwhahaha! Dead avocados will smoosh on your head! That's what happened to MY hair, and it never recovered.
Fear my Snapey wrath. Don't MAKE me SNAPE my fingers in a Dark Mark formation!
I'm gonna have to start singing...O.o
trent_reznor, could it be a duet?
Now, I want a six-thousand word from all of you chillldreeennn about how... er... The Effect Of Snape's Pwnz0rzness On Submissive, Sniveling Little Children.
Or a drunken Filch will be waiting in the dungeons with a croquet mallet and a rutabaga.
i killed filch, i submerged him in boiling flesh
ZOMG! Can I be Santa Clause???
Myesss. You may be Santa Claus.
Now, sit down, Mr. Claus, and explain to me exactly how you decide whether I belong on the Naughty list or the Nice list.
No one else can seem to decide.
That's Miss Clause to you. Mr. Clause died. I am his terribly named daughter. I don't do lists anymore. I just chuck random items at people.
I am Zulu, Queen of the Dwarf People of Mars!
If I sucked up to you, the best potion master there ever was, would I get good grades?
Yay! Now what should we sing?
Jingle Bell Rock. ^^
Let's do it!
~*Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock!*~
I HATE JINGLE BELL ROCK.
SILENCE, IMBECILES!
You will sit down brew your potions until your nobby little elbows scream for mercy from the horrible strain!
-audible laughter-, its ok, alot of people talk to me like that
Oh my. Will a sugar cookie shaped like a Christmas tree make you feel better?
Ok,then. WHat do you want to sing?
I also loathe Jingle Bell Rock.
I detest Christmas. Santa Claus never brings me ANYTHING but a lump of dried-up orange play-do stuck to a fuzzy half-eaten peppermint.
Bah humbug.
But that's the best kind of gift! Everyone else usually gets raisins glued together in the shape of raindeer.
Potions??? No way. I make socks. -chucks purple socks at you-
*grabs Snape by the collar* Listen Mate, you better learn to shut your face or Ill do it for you, got it?
Now where is that insufferable Potter, and that slimy little Dorko Mouth-boy? If I catch them cutting class one more time... I... I'll make them trade hairdos!
Yes! That would be deliciously dastardly!
Potter: here I am!
No, I'm over here!
No, here!
Me: Shut up! *grabs Christmas cookie and chucks at his head* there! now you have TWO scars!
Ack! That is NOT what Christmas tree cookies are for! I think I should reinstate the list policy. -sigh-
There ought to be more disgusting little maggots... I mean... pupils in this class? Where are they all? Kissing in broom cupboards and throwing rotten eggs and house elves at Miss Norris, no doubt.
Balderdash, it matters not to me. They'll all get detention in any case, and then they'll be sorry.
What should we sing?
I know only one song, and this is it:
You despise everyone, and everyone despises you
None of this surprises you
When you are Snape
The endless halls of the school of witchcraft and wizardry
Fill you up with... misery
When you are Snape
Oh, nooo...
But it's okay to feel like Snape
To feel so sad and grumpity
Just relax, there's no escape
At least you're in good company...
That's me!
I'm sorry about that. Here (pulls out brand new cookie* I baked it myself!
Miss Clause does not serve detention. She is a habitual truant.
Yes, Miss Clause, well some would argue that you do not exist and I therefore cannot give you detention.
But I've given detention to the tooth fairy, the Brave Little Toaster, Big Bird, every single power ranger except the yellow one, Artemis Fowl, the Spice Girls (that was my favourite detention), Optimus Prime, and Darth Vader.
What's to stop me now?
Not sure. Elves?
No. Elves cower in my presence. They quiver in the massive, imposing shadow cast by my vast nose.
You think you can hold us in a mere detention room? We are mighty! We are invincible! We are the TRUANT SQUAD!
If you try to leave, I will breathe on you with my foul, festering, garlicky breath and send you to the awaiting arms of the eternal sleep of DEATH!
*chucks tic-tacs at him* That's what you think! ATTACK!
Well, you must not have met toy-making elves. They can be pretty feisty, especially if you take away their expresso.
Yes, well, I find they are quite cooperative when I threaten them with socks.
Most elves are terrified of the prospect of clothing.
My socks are even worse because they haven't been washed for thirty-seven years and are full of my Snapey stench!
My elves absolutely love clothes. I have to put tracking devices on their little ankles to keep them from getting lost in the mall.
It's even worse for elves you love clothes. They weep at the heedless destruction I've wreaked wretchedly upon my innocent socks.
Fwahaha.
They'll probably devise a rescue mission to save your poor socks. They're weird like that.
Okay, okay, guys, you've got me. I admit it.
I'm not REALLY Snape. I'm Dudley Dursley.
Happy?
*Waddles off to go sulk and hit things with my Smeltings stick*
-audible laughter-.
Aww, don't worry. You'll get an extra cookie for Christmas along with your orange clay peppermint thing. ^^
Bye, guys! It's been fun being insane and pretending to be Harry Potter characters!
Have a nice day!
Well, it's summer, and guess what I've been doing?
Here are the contents of a board called "I Am Snape, The Potions Master." I am the purple letter, and I was trying to convince people that I was Snape:
Hellllooo, children.
I am Severus Snape.
No, really.
Now turn to page 394, or I shall school you in the subtle art and exact science of detention. Don't MAKE me drip my greasy hair on you.
Let's go bother Snape!
Right-O!
BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER!!!
No! Don't bother me! I shall prod you with my large and freakish nose, you naughty child!
god and that james kid douted I was sane
What bout u!
Hehehehe. BOTHER!!
JAMES?! Did you say James? DO NOT MENTION JAMES "THE WALRUS" POTTER.
Detention, Miss Rad_glow_stixz! You must write fifty time, "I shall not be a twit!" Now brew me a Forgiveness Potion and I may have a modicum of mercy for you.
yay and im paris hilton oh get a life
Sit down, Miss Hilton. I do not tolerate talk like that in my classroom.
SoooOOOooOOO, d0es any0ne kn0w what p0ti0n is created by an inf00sion of asph0del and w0rmw00d?
What? I can be a 1337 professor if I like. Stop smirking or I shall be forced to berate you severely with a cactus.
YAy! sonic is here to save us!!
Sonic? I do not allow hedgehogs in my classroom. Unless I am dissecting them for a potion. If this "Sonic" does not wish to be part of a potion, tell him to vacate these premises at once.
NOBODY TALKS TO MY HEDGEHOG LIKE THAT. I OUGHT TO SPLIT YOU IN HALF AND EAT ALL YOUR INSIDES. I OUGHT TO RIP OUT YOUR HAIRS SLICE OPEN YOUR HEART, TAKE ALL THE ICKYNESS OUT AND FILL IT WITH YOUR GRIMY GREASY HAIR!!!
Oh Sanpe, I know what you did last week...
Really, Miss Murdocobsessedmaniac? What did I do last week?
I know what you did last week. You failed my exam, that's what. DETENTION.
I was hiding under your bed, youre disgusting by the way. And isnt it abvious your supposed to call me 'Stalker'? Dont make me get the owner of my soul in here.
no.
I HATE SNAPE!
How dare you, Miss Kitkatluvr? I don't need to be a Legilimens to hear slanderous talk like that, and I am frankly shocked.
Do not make me force you to drink this WEASELS STUCK TO YOUR FACE POTION.
LMAO!
OOoooh, Snapey! *pulls out wand* avadacadavra!
AVOCADO-CADAVER!
Mwhahaha! Dead avocados will smoosh on your head! That's what happened to MY hair, and it never recovered.
Fear my Snapey wrath. Don't MAKE me SNAPE my fingers in a Dark Mark formation!
I'm gonna have to start singing...O.o
trent_reznor, could it be a duet?
Now, I want a six-thousand word from all of you chillldreeennn about how... er... The Effect Of Snape's Pwnz0rzness On Submissive, Sniveling Little Children.
Or a drunken Filch will be waiting in the dungeons with a croquet mallet and a rutabaga.
i killed filch, i submerged him in boiling flesh
ZOMG! Can I be Santa Clause???
Myesss. You may be Santa Claus.
Now, sit down, Mr. Claus, and explain to me exactly how you decide whether I belong on the Naughty list or the Nice list.
No one else can seem to decide.
That's Miss Clause to you. Mr. Clause died. I am his terribly named daughter. I don't do lists anymore. I just chuck random items at people.
I am Zulu, Queen of the Dwarf People of Mars!
If I sucked up to you, the best potion master there ever was, would I get good grades?
Yay! Now what should we sing?
Jingle Bell Rock. ^^
Let's do it!
~*Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock!*~
I HATE JINGLE BELL ROCK.
SILENCE, IMBECILES!
You will sit down brew your potions until your nobby little elbows scream for mercy from the horrible strain!
-audible laughter-, its ok, alot of people talk to me like that
Oh my. Will a sugar cookie shaped like a Christmas tree make you feel better?
Ok,then. WHat do you want to sing?
I also loathe Jingle Bell Rock.
I detest Christmas. Santa Claus never brings me ANYTHING but a lump of dried-up orange play-do stuck to a fuzzy half-eaten peppermint.
Bah humbug.
But that's the best kind of gift! Everyone else usually gets raisins glued together in the shape of raindeer.
Potions??? No way. I make socks. -chucks purple socks at you-
*grabs Snape by the collar* Listen Mate, you better learn to shut your face or Ill do it for you, got it?
Now where is that insufferable Potter, and that slimy little Dorko Mouth-boy? If I catch them cutting class one more time... I... I'll make them trade hairdos!
Yes! That would be deliciously dastardly!
Potter: here I am!
No, I'm over here!
No, here!
Me: Shut up! *grabs Christmas cookie and chucks at his head* there! now you have TWO scars!
Ack! That is NOT what Christmas tree cookies are for! I think I should reinstate the list policy. -sigh-
There ought to be more disgusting little maggots... I mean... pupils in this class? Where are they all? Kissing in broom cupboards and throwing rotten eggs and house elves at Miss Norris, no doubt.
Balderdash, it matters not to me. They'll all get detention in any case, and then they'll be sorry.
What should we sing?
I know only one song, and this is it:
You despise everyone, and everyone despises you
None of this surprises you
When you are Snape
The endless halls of the school of witchcraft and wizardry
Fill you up with... misery
When you are Snape
Oh, nooo...
But it's okay to feel like Snape
To feel so sad and grumpity
Just relax, there's no escape
At least you're in good company...
That's me!
I'm sorry about that. Here (pulls out brand new cookie* I baked it myself!
Miss Clause does not serve detention. She is a habitual truant.
Yes, Miss Clause, well some would argue that you do not exist and I therefore cannot give you detention.
But I've given detention to the tooth fairy, the Brave Little Toaster, Big Bird, every single power ranger except the yellow one, Artemis Fowl, the Spice Girls (that was my favourite detention), Optimus Prime, and Darth Vader.
What's to stop me now?
Not sure. Elves?
No. Elves cower in my presence. They quiver in the massive, imposing shadow cast by my vast nose.
You think you can hold us in a mere detention room? We are mighty! We are invincible! We are the TRUANT SQUAD!
If you try to leave, I will breathe on you with my foul, festering, garlicky breath and send you to the awaiting arms of the eternal sleep of DEATH!
*chucks tic-tacs at him* That's what you think! ATTACK!
Well, you must not have met toy-making elves. They can be pretty feisty, especially if you take away their expresso.
Yes, well, I find they are quite cooperative when I threaten them with socks.
Most elves are terrified of the prospect of clothing.
My socks are even worse because they haven't been washed for thirty-seven years and are full of my Snapey stench!
My elves absolutely love clothes. I have to put tracking devices on their little ankles to keep them from getting lost in the mall.
It's even worse for elves you love clothes. They weep at the heedless destruction I've wreaked wretchedly upon my innocent socks.
Fwahaha.
They'll probably devise a rescue mission to save your poor socks. They're weird like that.
Okay, okay, guys, you've got me. I admit it.
I'm not REALLY Snape. I'm Dudley Dursley.
Happy?
*Waddles off to go sulk and hit things with my Smeltings stick*
-audible laughter-.
Aww, don't worry. You'll get an extra cookie for Christmas along with your orange clay peppermint thing. ^^
Bye, guys! It's been fun being insane and pretending to be Harry Potter characters!
Have a nice day!