Post by Nemo on Jul 3, 2007 8:56:19 GMT -5
How The Russians Won The Cold War
Please note that all Russian dialogue has been
translated from the original Cyrillic out of courtesy
for our non-Russian readers. Thank-you
Prologue:
We all know the end of the cold war, but have we ever considered how people felt during the war? People must have lived in constant fear of the nuclear weapons trained on us. It was feared that even if we weren’t blasted to radioactive smithereens, the Russians would conquer us and the American way of life would be gone. Let us assume for a moment that we did not peacefully end the war and settle our differences. If the Russians won the war and occupied America, it’s hard to imagine the rut we’d be in! In this imaginary world, the war did not end peacefully. What follows is the story of the capture, subjugation, and battle for America.
Part I
Chapter 1
The capture of the American capitol had taken less than two days. The new Russian premier of the American province was dining with his top officials. It was shortly after the main course and they were sipping vodka. Although the premier was usually a good leader with a cheerful disposition, he had a weakness for drinking vodka. His mood was quite wanting when the messenger entered the room and waved him over to the door.
“What is it?” the premier asked grouchily, “I was in the middle of a relaxing and enjoyable dinner!”
The messenger nervously began his explanation for the intrusion. “I am very sorry, my premier, but I have very important, bad news” he began. “We have detected a dozen high-speed cargo jets flying north through Canada. We believe they are commanded by a pair of top generals who are missing on the POW roster.”
The premier, whose face had been growing redder throughout the report, burst out “Well? Continue! Where are they going? How did they get out? What do you think are their plans?”
“Please, premier, slow down! We think that they are trying to reach and invade Russia from over the North Pole, but we can’t be sure. We lost their positions in the solar wind at the ninetieth parallel. The records show that they left just an hour before the capture of Washington with some top-secret prototype weaponry.”
“Send searches throughout Russia immediately! We cannot allow the motherland to fall!
Chapter 2
Meanwhile, in a convoy of high-speed cargo jets flying over the North Polo, two renegade American generals conferred. “Look Xavier,” Vorian said cheerfully, “we go out, we have the weaponry, and we’ve probably given the Russian officials back in Washington a head ache they’ll never forget. Lighten up!”
Xavier, implacable as ever, responded soberly “we’ve only just begun this and we need a plan if we’re going to survive, let alone succeed in taking back America. Do you have any suggestions?”
Glancing out the window, Vorian took a moment before responding. “Well… we’re going to the north pole anyway. Why not keep going and set up base in Siberia to strike them while they’re focused on America? He answered uncertainly.
Xavier pondered it awhile and said, “I have a felling they’d be expecting that, but here’s a thought. Let’s let them think that we went to Siberia, but stay and hide here in the solar wind for a while, while they scour Russia. After that, we can move relatively undetected, right: what do you think?”
“Sounds like a great idea, Xavier. How long do you think we’ll have to be up here on the polo?” Vorian asked.
While checking a roster of the equipment that they had brought with them, Xavier said, “Well, if we stayed for a month or two, we could deploy the liquid nitrogen tank on the north pole.”
“Sounds good to me,” said Vorian “If we’re gonna be here for a few months, I propose that we also build a base there.”
“I concur,” said Xavier. “Let’s get to it!”
Chapter 3
Two months later, the premier was speaking with his advisors, a bit more soberly this time. “Have the searches in Russia turned up anything?” He asked.
“We have found nothing of any importance or threat in Russia. We believe that they went down in a hurricane sized storm over the Arctic Ocean.” Said an adviser.
While consulting a report from the director of the search, the premier commented, “I also see that no clear wreckage has been found. Are you sure that they are dead?”
The various advisors fidgeted nervously, but one spoke up saying “although we are unsure, we have found debris, which was probably from their planes, suggesting that they went down in the storm. We are about 91% sure of this.”
The premier thought hard for a moment. “That seems reasonable. They probably went down in the storm and if not, they do not seem to be threatening Russia. Write them off as dead.” Said the premier, sealing his own fate.
Chapter 4
On the North Pole, Vorian was frustrated and bored with the pointlessness of their location. The liquid nitrogen weapon, a giant tank of liquid nitrogen installed with an Archimedes screw so that it could be used as an ice age doomsday device, was finished and the base was running smoothly. Despite this, there was a big problem. They couldn’t do anything! They were stuck at the end of the Earth with enough experimental weaponry to blow half the Russians to kingdom come, but they couldn’t even explore outside the base because the ice would break under the weight of heavy weaponry. He decided to talk to Xavier about it. He walked through the chilly underground base to the main headquarters where Xavier would be.
“Xavier, we have a problem.” He said straightforwardly. “Can we talk?”
“Sure, Vor.” Said Xavier with a quizzical look. Vorian brought him over to the empty conference room outside the command room.
Quickly, Vorian explained their plight. “So, do you have any ideas?” Asked Vorian hopefully.
“If our problem is that we have a bad base location, the logical solution is to find a new base, right?” Xavier said.
“I suppose it is, but where would be a good place? Perhaps a pacific island or in Siberia?” asked Vorian earnestly.
“Siberia might not be a good place right now if the Russians are still searching for us there. A Pacific island would be perfect for us though. If we lodged it in a dormant volcano, the Russians would never suspect we’re there!”
Vorian enthusiastically replied, “Lets go hunting for volcanoes!”
Chapter 5
They found a suitable volcano after only a week of searching, but realized that they could never build such a base with the meager workforce of soldiers who had escaped with them. They decided that what they ought to do was rescue some US citizens from Russian enslavement in a raid and use their services on the volcano fort. The raid was to take place at 6:00 A.M. on the city of Los Angeles, where they assumed they could find a lot of people, fast. They deployed three Mammoth prototype tank carriers about half a mile out to sea along with about a dozen evac-helicopters to get people. The shore defense canons detected the oncoming vehicles and started firing at them. As the missiles whizzed past Xavier, who was on the bridge of the leading mammoth, he gave orders to the rest of the people. “Keep moving till we can shoot them out with the lasers.” He said. “Hit the big one with a sidewinder missile before it-“
He was cut off when the behemoth careened to one side as a missile from the shore cannon hit the leg of their mammoth. Unfortunately for the cannon, the sidewinder missile had already been launched and had blown it apart before it could destroy the mammoth. Although they couldn’t move, Xavier’s mammoth continued to lend fire support and Xavier continued to command the operation. “Great job, men.” Xavier said over the comm. System after they had recruited about 1000 people. “Let’s head back to base now.” Xavier’s mammoth was repaired easily, the missile had just dislocated the front, right knee joint. With that done, they clomped back to the ocean, where the transports awaited them.
Chapter 6
While Xavier had been away, Vorian had been designing the new volcano fortress to its utmost potential. It would take advantage of the lava itself in two ways, as an energy source and a self-destruct system. The caldera would serve as an aircraft hanger for overlarge aircraft, such as the corncob cruisers, and as a docking area for submarines. There were also two natural lava tubes, one underwater to be used by the submarines, and another tube high above the waterline that would be used by the aircraft in the caldera hanger. To use up the rest of the space in the caldera, there would be a headquarters and nuclear reactor suspended inside. The top would be closed over and its space used for growing food and people’s living space. The rim or the volcano would be used as command centers for a type of remote warship. A factory dug out of the lower levels of the volcano’s side would build new weapons and be supplied by a mining site in the mineral rich magma plug. Several labs would be built into the sides of the volcano. The defensive systems would include several large pools of oil in metal reservoirs placed in the lava which could be released to the surface where they would burst into flame upon getting oxygen, creating an ultra-hot ring of fire. There would also be several tesla coils, long rods with a ball on the end, filled with static electricity. This would, in effect, discharge a lightning bolt at whoever got too close to it. The base would also contain hangers, docks, and garages for all their weaponry. He hoped that Xavier would be pleased with it.
Chapter 7
Xavier came back to the island base about two weeks later and had brought the essential workforce with him. He began by seeking out Vorian.
“How’s the planning going, Vor?” Xavier asked.
“ The planning’s already finished!” Vorian responded eagerly as he showed Xavier the schematics. “What do you think of it?”
“It doesn’t look half bad, Vor. In fact, it looks great! Nice work.” Said Xavier congenially. “With our new workers, this’ll be a cinch! By the way, I especially think the bombs in the magma plug is a good idea.” Speaking more solemnly, he said “That self-destruct system my become necessary in our direst hour.”
“Let’s not think about that, Xavier!” Said Vorian, as though scolding him, “This base will be both undetectable and next to impregnable too. All we need to do now is use it.”
“I guess you’re right, Vor.” Said Xavier, still looking unconvinced.
“I suggest that we start by building the caldera roof.” Said Vorian.
“I concur.” Agreed Xavier.
Chapter 8
The main bas was finished about three quarters of a year later and the Russians didn’t even suspect its existence! It was filled with weaponry from top to bottom, all of which was lying as dormant as the volcano. They wouldn’t be dormant for much longer though. In the command center, deep within the caldera, there was a frenzy of activity as the volcano and its staff prepared to go to war.
“All crews report to your shark sub, squid sub, or nitrogen sub.” Said a voice over the intercom system. “Commanders, gunners, pilots, and mini sub operators report to your remote ship command centers.” This voice was followed by a new wave of activity as people went to their assigned battle stations.
“Prepare to launch!” Rang Xavier’s voice over the intercom. “And remember, do as much damage to the Soviets as possible. America is counting on us, people! Make her proud!”
At those words a cheer arose which, were it not contained by the extra-dense volcano rock, could have been picked up by a listening buoy of the coast of England. With those words still ring in their ears, they submerged and set out, with glory in their hearts, to harass the enemy and his shipping lanes as much as they possibly could. High in the command center, Vorian and Xavier watched them go with pride. “I… I guess we should start working on the second half of our plan.” Said Vorian.
“I suppose you’re right, Vor. Let’s get to work.” Agreed Xavier.
Please note that all Russian dialogue has been
translated from the original Cyrillic out of courtesy
for our non-Russian readers. Thank-you
Prologue:
We all know the end of the cold war, but have we ever considered how people felt during the war? People must have lived in constant fear of the nuclear weapons trained on us. It was feared that even if we weren’t blasted to radioactive smithereens, the Russians would conquer us and the American way of life would be gone. Let us assume for a moment that we did not peacefully end the war and settle our differences. If the Russians won the war and occupied America, it’s hard to imagine the rut we’d be in! In this imaginary world, the war did not end peacefully. What follows is the story of the capture, subjugation, and battle for America.
Part I
Chapter 1
The capture of the American capitol had taken less than two days. The new Russian premier of the American province was dining with his top officials. It was shortly after the main course and they were sipping vodka. Although the premier was usually a good leader with a cheerful disposition, he had a weakness for drinking vodka. His mood was quite wanting when the messenger entered the room and waved him over to the door.
“What is it?” the premier asked grouchily, “I was in the middle of a relaxing and enjoyable dinner!”
The messenger nervously began his explanation for the intrusion. “I am very sorry, my premier, but I have very important, bad news” he began. “We have detected a dozen high-speed cargo jets flying north through Canada. We believe they are commanded by a pair of top generals who are missing on the POW roster.”
The premier, whose face had been growing redder throughout the report, burst out “Well? Continue! Where are they going? How did they get out? What do you think are their plans?”
“Please, premier, slow down! We think that they are trying to reach and invade Russia from over the North Pole, but we can’t be sure. We lost their positions in the solar wind at the ninetieth parallel. The records show that they left just an hour before the capture of Washington with some top-secret prototype weaponry.”
“Send searches throughout Russia immediately! We cannot allow the motherland to fall!
Chapter 2
Meanwhile, in a convoy of high-speed cargo jets flying over the North Polo, two renegade American generals conferred. “Look Xavier,” Vorian said cheerfully, “we go out, we have the weaponry, and we’ve probably given the Russian officials back in Washington a head ache they’ll never forget. Lighten up!”
Xavier, implacable as ever, responded soberly “we’ve only just begun this and we need a plan if we’re going to survive, let alone succeed in taking back America. Do you have any suggestions?”
Glancing out the window, Vorian took a moment before responding. “Well… we’re going to the north pole anyway. Why not keep going and set up base in Siberia to strike them while they’re focused on America? He answered uncertainly.
Xavier pondered it awhile and said, “I have a felling they’d be expecting that, but here’s a thought. Let’s let them think that we went to Siberia, but stay and hide here in the solar wind for a while, while they scour Russia. After that, we can move relatively undetected, right: what do you think?”
“Sounds like a great idea, Xavier. How long do you think we’ll have to be up here on the polo?” Vorian asked.
While checking a roster of the equipment that they had brought with them, Xavier said, “Well, if we stayed for a month or two, we could deploy the liquid nitrogen tank on the north pole.”
“Sounds good to me,” said Vorian “If we’re gonna be here for a few months, I propose that we also build a base there.”
“I concur,” said Xavier. “Let’s get to it!”
Chapter 3
Two months later, the premier was speaking with his advisors, a bit more soberly this time. “Have the searches in Russia turned up anything?” He asked.
“We have found nothing of any importance or threat in Russia. We believe that they went down in a hurricane sized storm over the Arctic Ocean.” Said an adviser.
While consulting a report from the director of the search, the premier commented, “I also see that no clear wreckage has been found. Are you sure that they are dead?”
The various advisors fidgeted nervously, but one spoke up saying “although we are unsure, we have found debris, which was probably from their planes, suggesting that they went down in the storm. We are about 91% sure of this.”
The premier thought hard for a moment. “That seems reasonable. They probably went down in the storm and if not, they do not seem to be threatening Russia. Write them off as dead.” Said the premier, sealing his own fate.
Chapter 4
On the North Pole, Vorian was frustrated and bored with the pointlessness of their location. The liquid nitrogen weapon, a giant tank of liquid nitrogen installed with an Archimedes screw so that it could be used as an ice age doomsday device, was finished and the base was running smoothly. Despite this, there was a big problem. They couldn’t do anything! They were stuck at the end of the Earth with enough experimental weaponry to blow half the Russians to kingdom come, but they couldn’t even explore outside the base because the ice would break under the weight of heavy weaponry. He decided to talk to Xavier about it. He walked through the chilly underground base to the main headquarters where Xavier would be.
“Xavier, we have a problem.” He said straightforwardly. “Can we talk?”
“Sure, Vor.” Said Xavier with a quizzical look. Vorian brought him over to the empty conference room outside the command room.
Quickly, Vorian explained their plight. “So, do you have any ideas?” Asked Vorian hopefully.
“If our problem is that we have a bad base location, the logical solution is to find a new base, right?” Xavier said.
“I suppose it is, but where would be a good place? Perhaps a pacific island or in Siberia?” asked Vorian earnestly.
“Siberia might not be a good place right now if the Russians are still searching for us there. A Pacific island would be perfect for us though. If we lodged it in a dormant volcano, the Russians would never suspect we’re there!”
Vorian enthusiastically replied, “Lets go hunting for volcanoes!”
Chapter 5
They found a suitable volcano after only a week of searching, but realized that they could never build such a base with the meager workforce of soldiers who had escaped with them. They decided that what they ought to do was rescue some US citizens from Russian enslavement in a raid and use their services on the volcano fort. The raid was to take place at 6:00 A.M. on the city of Los Angeles, where they assumed they could find a lot of people, fast. They deployed three Mammoth prototype tank carriers about half a mile out to sea along with about a dozen evac-helicopters to get people. The shore defense canons detected the oncoming vehicles and started firing at them. As the missiles whizzed past Xavier, who was on the bridge of the leading mammoth, he gave orders to the rest of the people. “Keep moving till we can shoot them out with the lasers.” He said. “Hit the big one with a sidewinder missile before it-“
He was cut off when the behemoth careened to one side as a missile from the shore cannon hit the leg of their mammoth. Unfortunately for the cannon, the sidewinder missile had already been launched and had blown it apart before it could destroy the mammoth. Although they couldn’t move, Xavier’s mammoth continued to lend fire support and Xavier continued to command the operation. “Great job, men.” Xavier said over the comm. System after they had recruited about 1000 people. “Let’s head back to base now.” Xavier’s mammoth was repaired easily, the missile had just dislocated the front, right knee joint. With that done, they clomped back to the ocean, where the transports awaited them.
Chapter 6
While Xavier had been away, Vorian had been designing the new volcano fortress to its utmost potential. It would take advantage of the lava itself in two ways, as an energy source and a self-destruct system. The caldera would serve as an aircraft hanger for overlarge aircraft, such as the corncob cruisers, and as a docking area for submarines. There were also two natural lava tubes, one underwater to be used by the submarines, and another tube high above the waterline that would be used by the aircraft in the caldera hanger. To use up the rest of the space in the caldera, there would be a headquarters and nuclear reactor suspended inside. The top would be closed over and its space used for growing food and people’s living space. The rim or the volcano would be used as command centers for a type of remote warship. A factory dug out of the lower levels of the volcano’s side would build new weapons and be supplied by a mining site in the mineral rich magma plug. Several labs would be built into the sides of the volcano. The defensive systems would include several large pools of oil in metal reservoirs placed in the lava which could be released to the surface where they would burst into flame upon getting oxygen, creating an ultra-hot ring of fire. There would also be several tesla coils, long rods with a ball on the end, filled with static electricity. This would, in effect, discharge a lightning bolt at whoever got too close to it. The base would also contain hangers, docks, and garages for all their weaponry. He hoped that Xavier would be pleased with it.
Chapter 7
Xavier came back to the island base about two weeks later and had brought the essential workforce with him. He began by seeking out Vorian.
“How’s the planning going, Vor?” Xavier asked.
“ The planning’s already finished!” Vorian responded eagerly as he showed Xavier the schematics. “What do you think of it?”
“It doesn’t look half bad, Vor. In fact, it looks great! Nice work.” Said Xavier congenially. “With our new workers, this’ll be a cinch! By the way, I especially think the bombs in the magma plug is a good idea.” Speaking more solemnly, he said “That self-destruct system my become necessary in our direst hour.”
“Let’s not think about that, Xavier!” Said Vorian, as though scolding him, “This base will be both undetectable and next to impregnable too. All we need to do now is use it.”
“I guess you’re right, Vor.” Said Xavier, still looking unconvinced.
“I suggest that we start by building the caldera roof.” Said Vorian.
“I concur.” Agreed Xavier.
Chapter 8
The main bas was finished about three quarters of a year later and the Russians didn’t even suspect its existence! It was filled with weaponry from top to bottom, all of which was lying as dormant as the volcano. They wouldn’t be dormant for much longer though. In the command center, deep within the caldera, there was a frenzy of activity as the volcano and its staff prepared to go to war.
“All crews report to your shark sub, squid sub, or nitrogen sub.” Said a voice over the intercom system. “Commanders, gunners, pilots, and mini sub operators report to your remote ship command centers.” This voice was followed by a new wave of activity as people went to their assigned battle stations.
“Prepare to launch!” Rang Xavier’s voice over the intercom. “And remember, do as much damage to the Soviets as possible. America is counting on us, people! Make her proud!”
At those words a cheer arose which, were it not contained by the extra-dense volcano rock, could have been picked up by a listening buoy of the coast of England. With those words still ring in their ears, they submerged and set out, with glory in their hearts, to harass the enemy and his shipping lanes as much as they possibly could. High in the command center, Vorian and Xavier watched them go with pride. “I… I guess we should start working on the second half of our plan.” Said Vorian.
“I suppose you’re right, Vor. Let’s get to work.” Agreed Xavier.
