Ignore This Thread

[Schmergo]

Everyone who's a member of the Crow's Nest, ignore this thread. It is for the benefit of people who belong to BroadwayWorld. Without further ado, "If BWW Were A Musical!"

Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Who would you cast to play yourself? Who would play some other... notables? What would some of the songs be like?


PiraguaGuy2:
Brian Peppers as Bwayfan
Lin-Manuel Miranda as PiraguaGuy2
Susan Blackwell as Schmerg the Impaler


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Oooh, I was thinkin' Tyler Maynard in drag for me, but that works, too!
Not so sure about Bwayfan9, though. Brian Peppers can't roller-skate.


BrodyFosse123:
Christopher Sieber as BrodyFosse123
Cheyenne Jackson as Wanna Be A Foster


Scott68:
Baayork Lee as Jay*
Bob Martin as D2
Cheyenne Jackson as Tazber
Elaine Stritch as StageManager2


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Some of the songs:

"Emma Zaks"-- To the tune of "The Ballad of Czolgosz" from Assassins.

"Sock Puppet Witch Hunt"-- To the tune of "The Mob Song" from BATB.

"Pickles"-- To no particular tune, as the mods would end the song nearly as soon as it began.

"Everything Coming Up's Closing!"-- To the tune of "Everything's Coming Up Roses."


PiraguaGuy2:
Emma Zaks as MTF3.


BNN:
I was thinking Bailey Hanks for MTF3.


PiraguaGuy2:
No, it’s Emma Zaks for obvious reasons.


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
But casting Bailey Hanks would just be so deliciously devilish! (Do you think she'd able to convincingly play a man?) That would be like casting David Bryant to play me!

I personally have nothing against MTF3 really, but I think he/she should sing a version of "I Speak Six Languages."


PiraguaGuy2:
We're Always Right/LuPwnage!: The Broadway Legends
Why Was I Banned?: SirNotAppearing/PiraguaGuy2 and Spellingbeefan/NGD
THIS IS THE THEATERRRRRRRRRR: Ziegfield
10/10: Jay*
A Love Song for Leigh Ann: Drunk Chita Rivera


Adamgreer:
Kerry Butler as Craig the Moderator!


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
"On November 2nd"-- To the tune of "Welcome To The Sixties" from Hairspray. Performed by Dollypop, naturally.

I think there needs to be a song about a certain hoofed animal of the Bambi variety to the tune of something from "Carrie." Or that cow song from "Batboy."

The important question is, who would Orfeh play?


Weez:
We need a number where the legit sopranos get to kick ass in recognition of non-belters like SporkGoddess and myself (and I know there's more). If we could somehow clone many Kelli O'Haras for that, I would be ENDLESSLY amused.

www.broadwayworld.com/board/readmessage.cfm?boardid=1&boardname=bway&thread=967853 - here we are! We need a song for us please! And if we can't clone Kelli O'Hara, I get dibs on Theresa McCarthy. :3

I reckon the Emma Zaks song would sit better to the Ballad of Booth than the Ballad of Czolgosz.

"What has musical theatre taught *you*, Weez?"
"Well, not only do I know who Leon Czolgosz was and what he's famous for, I also know how to spell it. Sondheim = an education!"



Bwayfan9:
"Drama" -Full Company
"I Luv wikkud and Rent (Reprise)!" Coolkid and the Fangirls
"The Anti Fangirl Song" TooDarnHot
"Closing Night Tickets/ I'm Sorry" Coolkid
"I Luv Wikkud I Love Rent" BeebleBable
"Stupidbeans and Bwayfan9" Broadwaynerd101
"Enough!" Bwafan9
"What the Word Needs Is Weez" Weez
"Let's Just Blame It On Bush" NGD2225, Bwayfan9, LizzzyCurry and Company

"Wikkud is Closing" Full Company
"We Need Some DRAMA!" Bwayfan9
"Stupid Sock" PiruagaGuy2, wicked_beast4
"I Don't Care If I Am Hated" Bwayfan9
"The If BWW Were A Musical Thread" Schmerg_The_Impaler
"(Insert German Phrase Here)"- Musicaltheatrefan3
"Well That is Something We Can All Agree On, Mtf3 SUCKS!" Full Company


Wicked_beast4:
YAY!!!! I get a duet about a dumb sock sock!!!

Can I be played by Jeff Bowen? I LOVE that man!


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
I hear ya, Weez. I'm a non-belter, as well-- though I'm more of a mezzo-soprano who can also do eerily accurate impressions of Michael Ball and Colm Wilkinson. And yeah, Ballad of Booth works better, but there's just something so relentlessly catchy about the Ballad of Czolgosz. And the 'work your way to the head of the line' thing works so beautifully for a reality show contestant.

Awww, bwayfan9... *hugs* I've never heard of anything as sad as the "I Don't Care If I'm Hated" song. Don't you do that to me and my heartstrings!

I'm thinking that my "The If BWW Were A Musical Thread" number would be very Title of Show-ish. Especially if I'm now Susan Blackwell.

How about Steve Blanchard for Broadwaynerd101? Or someone else 'beastly?' Oh, and there needs to be at least one song about Sarah Palin. Preferably one from "Evita."


Mattbrain:
How about a dramatic song for all of the threads that get deleted?


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
How about it's sung to the tune of "Pore Jud Is Daid" from Oklahoma?

There has to be some kind of preteen chatspeak-abusing fangirl song to the tune of "Omigod, You Guys!"

Mattbrain:
How about a song in which, we, the legends sing the praises of composers such as Michael John LaChiusa and Jason Robert Brown to the tune of The Old Red Hills of Home:

God bless the sounds
Of the new Stephen Sondheims


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Then there ought to also be a song for all of the pathetic newbies like myself. Probably to the tune of "Buenos Aires" or something.

"You wanna know whatcha gonna get in me
Just a clueless teenaged n00b named Schmergy!"


Trekkie2:
In the lobby, we'll sell our "Bryan sings" CD series, feating Bryan performing the scores to Cry-Baby, and all other shows that "rali ned a csat recordn."


PiraguaGuy2:
And there will be at least 600 threads here about what theatre it will take.


LynneSpock2:
Can I be in the ensemble?


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Nope, you can't, because you're a "Broadway Star."

You will have a song closely resembling "Diva's Lament" from Spamalot, only instead of being about a star who's shocked by how small her role is, it's about someone who wanted to be in the ensemble and was thrust kicking and screaming into the spotlight.

[Schmergo]

PiraguaGuy2:
"BWWB: The Musical" was directed by Uwe Boll with a book by David Lindsey-Abaire and music by Cher. It played 8 previews and 1/2 a performance (the audience got together independently at intermission and elected to boycott the second act of the show) at the Lyceum Theatre. It had the following cast:

Christopher Sieber as Craig
Gregg Edelman as Rob
Cheyenne Jackson as WannaBeaFoster
Christian Borle as PiraguaGuy2
Seth Rudetsky as Trekkie2
Celia Keenan-Bolger as LizzieCurry
Taylor Hicks as Bwayfan9
Graham Phillips as wicked_beast4
Susan Blackwell as Schmerg_the_Impaler
Elaine Stritch as StageManager2
Jenna Russell as Weez
Sarah Palin as NGD2225
Baayork Lee as Jay*
Bob Martin as Mr Roxy
John Tartaglia as coolkid1776
Norm Lewis as CurtainPullDowner
Emma Zaks as Musicaltheatrefan3
Barrett Foa as adamgreer

"BWWB: The Musical" followed three days in the life of the BroadwayWorld boards, after the closing of "Wicked" has just been announced.

Musical Numbers:
1. In the Beginning/Let There Be Light: Craig and Rob
2. Legendary: The Broadway Legends
3. Closing Night Wicked Tickets in Exchange for $10, Marvelous Wonderettes Tickets and a Blowjob: coolkid1776
4. Stupid Sock: PiraguaGuy2 and Schmerg_the_Impaler
5. WICCUD IS CLOSINK: Bwayfan9, Musicaltheatrefan3, and Socks
6. Legendary (reprise): The Broadway Stars
7. Something More (than Being Obnoxious): WannaBeaFoster, StageManager2, PiraguaGuy2, CurtainPullDowner, Weez, NGD2225, and Trekkie2
8. Hey Guys/Our Messiah Has Come: J* and Company
9. We Have to Stop Him: The Socks
10. They're All Anti Semites...Guten Tag Frankfurt Deutschland: Musicaltheatrefan3
11. Never Felt this Feeling: WannaBeaFoster and J*
12. Murder In the Air: PiraguaGuy2, Schmerg_the_Impaler and Company
13. Who Shot J*: Company
14. The World We Envisioned: Craig and Rob

1. What Will Close Next/It's What J* Would Have Wanted: WannaBeaFoster and Company
2. I'll Cling to You: Weez and StageManager2
3. Guys I Still Didn't Get an Answer: coolkid1776
4. Told You So: The Broadway Legends and the LuPwners
5. Everything Coming Up's Closing: Company
6. The Way Things Were: PiraguaGuy2
7. Okay, Seriously Guys, Who Shot J*?: Company
8. Hey, What If BWWB Was a Musical?: Schmerg_the_Impaler
9. Who's Going to the Wicked Closing: Company
10. Omigod You Guys (Coolkid Killed J*!): Company
11. Laying at Rest: J*
12. Someday, Somewhere: Craig, Rob, and Company


Lynnespock2:
I am sad. I thought I did fairly well at my audition. Maybe you remember me doing "I think Grease is great?"

Back to auditioning and waiting tables, err, teaching middle school. Show biz is a hard life!


PiraguaGuy2:
Well, we're still doing open casting calls for replacements. You just didn't fit Uwe Boll's vision of the show.


luvtheEmcee:
Someone decide who would play me. I could use a laugh.


B3TA07:
IDK what you look like but for some reason I imagine Jennifer Laura Thompson.

Or Faith Hill


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Laura Bell Bundy.

(What, you said you enjoyed a laugh...)

I... wait, whaaa? Why am I singin' "Stupid Sock," boy? I try not to insult people openly whenever possible. Now impaling, that is an entirely different matter!

After much revision of the show due to the horrible audience reaction (there was another stagehands' strike that refused to back down until this monstrocity was closed), BWW: The Musical reopened shortly thereafter, kind of like "The Scarlet Pimpernel," but without Rex Smith.

Unfortunately, this production was directed by Francesca Zambello. Even more unfortunately, Schmerg_The_Impaler sang the utterly tasteless, "I'm Going To Ramble Pointlessly About Michael Ball Now For Seven Straight Minutes While Impersonating His Vibrato" as the finale of Act One, which resulted in the rest of the cast brutally killing her by chucking their Heelys at her face. She was replaced in Act Two by a unicorn.


luvtheEmcee:
More a "... the hell?" than a laugh.


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Okay, now Brian D'Arcy James is playing you. Congratulations!


Adamgreer:
I'm a role in the show!!! YAY!!! And Barrett Foa is playing me. Not too shabby.

But, I didn't get a song. Oh well, at least I'm in the show!!


PiraguaGuy2:
Well, you’re in all the ‘Broadway Legend’ songs.


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Don't worry, in the re-tooled production I mentioned a few posts ago, you have your own song. It's called "If Wicked's A Marketing Excercise, It's A Pretty Dingitty-Dang Good One." I think it's to the tune of "Henry Ford" from Ragtime.


PiraguaGuy2:
Do I still get my eleven 'o clock solo number or was I replaced by Glenn Close?


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
You and Glenn Close sing a duet that ends with her shooting you by a swimming pool full of tickets to the closing of "Wicked." It's very emotional, especially when the helicopter lands and the chandelier crashes and OJ Simpson rides the cherry picker.


PiraguaGuy2:
Do we keep the Jay* murder plotline?


Adamgreer:
Can I be the understudy for coolkid, too??


PiraguaGuy2:
No, that's Brian Peppers.
You can be the WannaBeaFoster understudy.


KathyGriffinLovesYou:
Where am I!? I WANNA BE HEIDI BLICKENSTAFF!!


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Oh, yes. J* is pushed off Pride Rock by coolkid. As for the posters whose accounts have been deleted, they symbolically die at the barricades, with the mods symbolizing the National Guard. Oh yeah, and all of the sets are Woman In White style holographs.

Adamgreer, you can be the second understudy for coolkid, but the first understudy is Harvey Fierstein.

Kathy, if you're Heidi, you and I can sing "Secondary Characters" together! (Oddly, I actually look a lot like Heidi in real life. But I kind of prefer Susan.)


PiraguaGuy2:
Schmerg, I still have creative control here. That's NOT how I or David Lindsay-Abaire envisioned the J* plotline.


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Yes, but the audience didn't like it when he was eaten by a giant plant, so the ending was retooled for the film adaptation with Rick Moranis.


PiraguaGuy2:
J* was shot during a motorcade from the window of a book warehouse in the original book.


Weez:
I'm intrigued by the creative decision to have me played by a fella. Did you run out of women, or are you just genuinely unaware of my gender? Also, I'm saddened that my big solo number - 'I Can't Believe What a Moron You Are' with purposefully ambiguous lyrics so it could be about nearly anyone - was cut during workshopping.


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Don't worry, now you have a song about ALW's cat dying and you play a major role in the West End Board song (which is entitled, "I Say, What ARE Those Wacky Yanks Up To Now?")

I know you're a woman, but I didn't question PiraguaGuy's casting because I thought there must be some method to his madness. Or something.


Robert Taylor:
Can I be in the show or should I just wait and write the review later?


KathyGriffinLovesYou:
omg no way! I look like Heidi too!

I think I look like a combination of Heidi, Idina, Lea Michele, and a few people think in 20 years I might resemble Barbara Chisholm—


PiraguaGuy2:
Weez - I honestly thought Gemiangi could pull off drag. But audiences in Milwaukee weren't satisfied with the performance, so it was recast with British import Jenna Russell.


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Robert Taylor, you basically play the role of the Man in Chair from Drowsy Chaperone. You watch the show with increasing disbelief and comment on things. Quite a role!

Awww, now Alex Gemignani needs a role. I love him to bits. Maybe he can play Patti LuPone. She's not a member of BWW per se, but she's even more of a presence than Sarah Palin here.


Dramarama2:
Can someone cast me? I think I'd play a great romantic lead (despite me not being a legend). If not, I could settle with composer or lyricist, since that role has not been filled, even though there's at least 4 song lists in this thread.


Adamgreer:
Don't worry about the cut scenes. For the fifth anniversary, you can put on a concert and perform the early draft.


PiraguaGuy2:
Actually, the songs are by Cher and the book is by David Lindsay-Abaire.


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Haha, we won't even make it to a five-performance anniversary! We'll make Glory Days look like Phantom!

Dramarama2, you are now played by Sean Palmer. You get to provide the Chicken In A Biskit.


Dramarama2:
Sean Palmer's hot.


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Would you like the costume for the role of dramarama2 to include those lovely white pants from "The Little Mermaid?" Quite a bum, that fella's got. (Incidentally, the Chicken In A Biskit is a reference to that "[Title of Show] Show" on youtube.)


PiraguaGuy2:
UPDATE: Celia Keenan-Bolger was crushed by a giant ship seconds before the opening number! She is currently suing the producers for millions, but in the meantime, her role has been taken over by Heidi Blickenstaff.


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Oh dear! Now who will play KathyGriffinLovesYou?

...

At the very last minute, her role was commandeered by Daphne Rubin-Vega. Jeepers!


PiraguaGuy2:
Christ, now we're really screwed.


Dramarama2:
I was hoping that I would be naked for most of the show.


Robert Taylor:
I like the idea of being the Man in the Chair...plus I can just cut off coolkid every time he gets on stage and tries to sing.

[Schmergo]

PiraguaGuy2:
Sean Palmer doesn't do nudity, so we had to replace him with Kathy Bates. [Insert yucky picture here]


KathyGriffinLovesYou:
Schmerg.

That comment on me being Daphne made me want to cry. Play Nice!

Heidi Blickenstaff understudied by Idina Menzel Stand-by(d?) by Lea Michele. Barbara Chisholm.


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Why can I not look away? Why?

Kathy-- this whole thread is a joke! Don't worry!


PiraguaGuy2:
There's fuller exposure with a quick Google search.


Dramarama2:
Gross. Kathy Bates...


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Haha, fear not, clothed Sean Palmer is willing to negotiate for the role in exchange for a private audience with Kathy Bates. (I reeeeally hope that none of the Broadway stars we've mentioned ever come across this thread...)


KathyGriffinLovesYou:
*Sniffle*


Dramarama2:
-audible laughter-, Do I get a song? He's got a nice voice....


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Kathy--*Pats on the head*

Don't you worry, just like in Les Mis, Daphne Rubin-Vega was replaced faster than you can say "I *gasp* dreamed a *pant* dreammm." Lea Michele is now playing you. Now, have another cough drop.

Dramarama-- Dude, he better have a song. His voice is sweet as angels sighing. Ummm... how about Sean Palmer AS you sings a song about how Sean Palmer is hot? Now THAT would mess with the audience's heads. (I personally think he looks a bit like Frankenstein's monster, but I can't deny he's got talent... and nice buns...)


Zepka102:
Hmmm... this must be the follow up with new characters to the hit BWW musical we created about 3 years ago!


KathyGriffinLovesYou:
*Bats eyes*
Thank you Schmergy.


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Yeah, it's like Phantom 2. Yours three years ago was the "hit musical." Ours is the monstrous flop that follows


Dancingthrulife04:
Someone cast me.


Dramarama2:
Yes. There could be a sub plot about how I fall in love with him, so he's actually falling in love with himself! GENIUS!


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Dancingthrulife, you will now be played by Adam Pascal! (Yes, I know, you're a girl...)

Dramarama, that could be a separate hit musical on its own... Say, what if you, Dramarama, are actually Sean Palmer in real life, but your online identity has developed a personality of its own and is obsessively stalking you!


Dramarama2:
Omg, that would be cool!


Givesmevoice:
this thread amuses me in its silliness and creativity. =P


dancingthrulife04:
-audible laughter-, Schmerg.


SporkGoddess:
I saw myself mentioned earlier! Do I get to be in it?



Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Here's the lovely poster I made for our musical. Notice that Alex Gemignani's head is on a girl's body.


BustopherPhantom:
Ooo! Ooo! Who plays me?! Who am I?!


KathyGriffinLovesYou:
Your avatar reminds me of Liza Minelli for some reason... hmm...


Bwayfan39:
So if someone acually writes this musical...is everyone who posted on this thread going to get a percentage of the money we make?


KathyGriffinLovesYou:
Just the people with actual roles.


Bwayfan39:
Oh. I see...what about the people who come up with the plot and write the music...are they not entitled to their share?


KathyGriffinLovesYou:
Of course. But if you come in and just say a random text abbreviation...


Bwayfan39:
...ah yes...of course...just making sure all the legal issues are out of the way


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
No, no, no, nobody will make any money because my parents will embezzle it all and establish a 'college fund' for me which is actually a yacht for them.

Everyone whose role hasn't been stated explicitly can just pick an actor who already hasn't been listed. Oh, and by the way, we're all playing instruments onstage, so you better have some musical experience. I myself am playing the triangle.


WishingOnlyWounds2:
Who plays me? Or was Wishing not thought of :[


KathyGriffinLovesYou:
Schmerggy you're such a moment killer.


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
You... you are played by Graham Phillips.

That is true, Kathy. I shoot them from helicopters. I've been explicitly banned from ever seeing "Jekyll and Hyde" again, because "This Is The Moment" is always interrupted by gunfire.


PiraguaGuy2:
No, Graham Phillips is already contracted to play wicked_beast4.


KathyGriffinLovesYou:
...
You are aware I'm biologically female?


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Oh, whoops, did I say Graham Phillips? Because by Graham Phillips, I meant Gary Coleman.

Mwahahahaaaa...

Kathy, I didn't mean YOU were Graham Phillips, I was responding to Wishing. Don't you worry!


KathyGriffinLovesYou:
GASP!!!

WELL YOU ARE A MEANIE HEAD!


Select A Member Name:
Aw I'm always late coming into the fun threads.
Anywhozers, Lauren Molina could play me.


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Oooh, Lauren Molina. She's looovely. By the way, your signature always makes me stop and think, and thinking is not something I usually do often.

Kathy, why am I a meanie head? I mean, other than the fact that my brother is at a marching band competition and I took the opportunity to snag a piece of his Halloween candy.


Mattbrain:
I want either James Barbour or Norm Lewis to play me!


KathyGriffinLovesYou:
Because you compared me to DRV AND DHP in the same thread!!

And when you say Kathy I always think you're talking to someone else. Random fact.


WishingOnlyWounds:
oooh, that was cold.

If your going to do something like that, at least make me like Trent Kowalik.


Select A Member Name:
Oooh, Lauren Molina. She's looovely. By the way, your signature always makes me stop and think, and thinking is not something I usually do often.

Why, thank you. I'm not quite sure I get your signature though...

[Schmergo]

PiraguaGuy2:
WishingOnlyWounds will be played by Becky Gulsvig.


KathyGriffinLovesYou:
HEHE! I'm a Broadway Star! I feel so special. This just made my day.

My life is sad.

Remember when I had just started? A young, theatre geek, destined to talk AND type about theatre every second of my life.


Mattbrain:
This is another idea I have. The song we sing about bryan is a spoof of the song, "Life After Life" from Dracula except it's called "Thread After Thread"


PiraguaGuy2:
Congrats. I was a Broadway Star, in another life, before I got banned for no reason, that is...


KathyGriffinLovesYou:
Well I'm sure they had a reason... think hard...


PiraguaGuy2:
They never even answered me. It was a little weird. It said "spamming", but I never spammed once. Whatever.


WishingOnlyWounds2:
Henry Hodges will play FinalDestination.


KathyGriffinLovesYou:
Well, I’m sorry, PG2.


PiraguaGuy2:
Oh, it's okay. I'm a Leading Actor now, a somebody, you hear me?

A SOMEBODY!


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Ooh, lots to respond to. Let's see...

Kathy Who Isn't Used To Being Called Kathy-- I was NOT saying that about you! I was saying that was WishingOnlyWounds2! And I was only joking, too. I replied to Wishing's comment at the same time you made yours, and it looked confusing.

Matt-- Norm Lewis is already playing CurtainPullDowner, or whatever the username is, but you are free to be James Barbour. Do realize that your character may be required to perv over some of the teenage members of the site. (Oh wait. Dingitty dang, that's me...)

Select A Member Name-- My signature is part of something I play called "The Pants Game." (Which is NOT the same as the Pajama Game.) Basically, you just take any line from a song and change one of the words in it to the word 'pants.' Like, if the line were, "God on high, hear my prayer, in my need you have always been there," you could change it to, "God on high, here my prayer, in my pants, you have always been there."

Well, the line I spoofed is, "In my life, she has burst like the music of angels, the light of the sun," which is sung by the character of Marius Pontmercy. And I couldn't resist. The Les Miserables site I'm a member of has a whole THREAD devoted to The Pants Game.


WishingOnlyWounds2:
Schmerg, what did I do to you?

Well, I'm now played by Becky. I'm satisfied.


KathyGriffinLovesYou:
Oh.


PiraguaGuy2:
Methinks I should take creative control.


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Oh guys, guys, you know I'm just a goofy goober. Wishing, I have nothing against you, but so many of the casting decisions we have on here are wack. Alexander Gemignani-- a big burly bearded guy-- is playing a GIRL. I don't mean to offend anyone, I just mean to make their eyes jump nineteen inches from their sockets and go, "WAIT, WHAAA?"


Mattbrain:
" Matt-- Norm Lewis is already playing CurtainPullDowner, or whatever the username is, but you are free to be James Barbour. Do realize that your character may be required to perv over some of the teenage members of the site. (Oh wait. Dingitty dang, that's me...)"

Yeah, I choose to focus on James Barbour's golden voice.


PiraguaGuy2:
Yes, but I recast that part.


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Yeah, I absolutely adore his voice as well, but I KNEW someone was going to make a comment about that, so I went ahead and did it myself. (Sometimes, I don't understand myself...) Awhile ago, I made a thread about how if there was a Harry Potter musical, he would be an awesome-saucin' Snape, and it turned into a 'let's see how many pervy jokes about Hermione we can make' thread.


Broadwaynerd101:
You left me out of the cast. Can I be in the show?

"How about Steve Blanchard for Broadwaynerd101? Or someone else 'beastly?"

HELL YEAH!

New song idea

"Schmergy is ferosh!"


SporkGoddess:
Who's playing me, assuming I get to be in it?


KathyGriffinLovesYou:
Leigh Ann Larkin.

Sorry if I spelled her name wrong!


Alliez920920:
This may possibly be the greatest thread ever.

Who plays me? Julia Murney? Hah


Select A Member Name:
Well, the line I spoofed is, "In my life, she has burst like the music of angels, the light of the sun," which is sung by the character of Marius Pontmercy. And I couldn't resist. The Les Miserables site I'm a member of has a whole THREAD devoted to The Pants Game.

ahah! that's sounds like a great game. I may have to try that out myself.


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
SporkGoddess, weren't you Kelli O'Hara? *Scratches chin* Well, you are now.

"Schmergy Is Ferosh," eh? It has potential. Maybe Beyonce and I can do a duet, her as Sasha Fierce and me as Schmergy Ferosh.

I'll work on the lyrics:

"Schmergy is ferosh
Which sounds like the German word for 'frog'
Except Schmerg isn't French.
She's German-American, dawg!"

Um... I think it might be best to leave it at that.


Esparza333:
i Can imagine the set for this the actors holding laptops and some with desks and projection screen that has various images BWW webpage that change throughout the show. the projection screen will rotate to make different backdrops for musical numbers.

Love This Thread


WishingOnlyWounds2:
Clay Aiken will play Broadwaynerd.


KathyGriffinLovesYou:
'
v


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
YES! My pathetic attempts at rap have been immortalized on BWW!

Wait 'till you see the rap I wrote about Montparnasse (a minor character from Les Miserables who I love way too much):

My best bro in the show fo sho is Parnasse
He's a pretty fly guy and a fine piece of [POSTERIOR]
I know it's cliche and I know it's hormonal
And I know he's got one line that's simply atonal
And I know that his mind is all twisted and sick,
But I've liked him the best since I first read the Brick!
'Cause I like me my dandies, and I like my fops
And I like me the gangstas who get past the cops!
Parnasse is a killa, you don't wanna be messin',
Unless you're Valjean, then you can teach him a lesson.
He's got a rose in his teeth, he's got womanly hips
He's got blood on his gloves to match his blood-red lips.
He lives in the hood and he dresses up posh
But he's not so stuck-up that he won't chill with Gavroche!
He's got a big lingre... I mean, in his cane.
That's why I love Monty, so call me insane!
WORD!

Myesss, I'm the next Lin-Manuel Miranda, no?


PiraguaGuy2:
No.



Broadwaynerd101:
HAHAHAHA no!

Just no.

I will be played by Steve Blanchard.

Here are the songs

"I NEED TICKETS TODAY!!" - Coolkid and the coolettes
"Schmergy Is Ferosh" - Sasha Fierce and Schmergy Ferosh
"I'm A Big Strong Beastly Beast" - Broadwaynerd
"Heil Myself" - MTF3 as Hitler
"STOP THAT curse CAMERA" - Patti Lupone
"Put the sock back in the drawer!" - NGD

The others are yet to be determined.


KathyGriffinLovesYou:
Schmerg. I am speechless.
omg! I wrote a poem about a local star leaving Santaland Diaries- a one person show he was made to do-
Oh Martin Burke! I love you so!
You have the eyes of a doe
You leaving Crumpet puts me in a woe
Oh why did you have to go?
Oh Martin Burke!
But you no longer remind me of a deer
A X- elf really can't be sincere
People will no longer cheer
Since you are no longer here
Oh Martin Burke!
Why wouldn't you want to wear green and bells?
You leaving makes my eyes well
My tears will well
I will always me your yell.


PiraguaGuy2:
Now rap about me.

[Schmergo]

Robert Taylor:
I'm thinking I should have a number to open the second act entitled "Robert Reviews Act One"


Select A Member Name:
The Word (not words) (Dis)Association Game, Part 5" - Off-Topic Board Company



GlindatheGood22:
I want Jennifer Damiano to play me!


Select A Member Name:
"No One Mourns the Banned"


Jagfkb:
can I be in it? I imagine myself in one act two number singing about the board being peaceful once and for all,then giving up when coollkid tells of seeing the closing of spring awakening when an angel swooped down and granted him tickets


wicked_beast4:
Can I be someone other than Grahm Philips? Although not that bad, I would rather not be an awkward, gawky teen with a scratchy, changing voice...

Broadwaynerd101:
Bleeble Blabble - Zac Effron
MTF3 - Emma Zaks
Coolkid - James Barbour
F***er2 - Randy Quaid (he has been unbanned for this occasion)
Chenzel - Vanessa Ann Hudgens
Averagejoe3 - Victoria Jackson : The prejudice


Heathurr2:
Aww, I love this thread.


Broadwaynerd101:
Who's gonna play Heathurrr?

And TDH should be Nathan Lane


Mattbrain:
But we just said that James Barbour is gonna play ME!


Broadwaynerd101:
Oh.

Then Linda Tripp will play Coolkid.


Mattbrain:
Well, if worse comes to worse, I'll be:

Stuck in a show/Where I am playing me


SporkGoddess:
Kelli O'Hara? Sweet!

And, yeah, it was mentioned, but I wasn't sure.


Heathurr2:
Unless there are other suggestions, I nominate Kristin Chenoweth to play me seeing as we are very similarly shaped.
(yay for short people!)
Oh, and Spork - Laura Benanti would play you of course.


Elphie3:
Not sure who would play me...? Stephanie J Block?


LimelightMike:
OoOh! This is fun!

Who'd play me?


Trekkie2:
Going by your profile picture Mike, I'd say Hunter Foster.
Now who would play me?


TheatreFreak05:
oooh! I wanna be a character

Paul W. Thompson:
I think I must come in late in the second act. Can I lead off the 11:00 number?

In which case, I must be played by John Barrowman........


WishingOnlyWounds2:
What ever happened to TooDarnHot?


Viola13:
This thread is hilarious, thank you for letting me procrastinate even more.


Broadwayboy101:
I want Cher to play me!


Thereisnofuture:
Can I be the mostly lurker who randomly comes in to ask for a part?


PiraguaGuy2:
Well, a lot of you who want to be cast were already cast on Page 2, so look at that.


Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Dude, my parents made me go to bed last night and I missed pages and pages of sweet ridiculosity.

Thereisnofuture, you'll be a chorus person who randomly runs to the front of the stage and tries to outdo everyone else onstage, and during pivotal moments of other people's solos, you start stealing the song. Don't fear, I have nothing against you... I just think it would be hilarious.

BUT WE HAVE AN EMERGENCY. We have no one yet for Michael Ball, my favourite human being, to play!


Mattbrain:
But who would play our dearly departed MargoChanning?


Lynnespock2:
Since I am not cast, I will be a screaming fan girl who will stalk WBAF, showing up at the stage door and demanding he take pictures with me.

Or maybe I AM stalking WBFA but e hasn't figured it out yet...

BTW, do you think the show will be reviewed? What kind of reviews do you predict?



Schmerg_The_Impaler:
Robert Taylor will review the show. His reviews will be glowing, but only because I'll be standing directly behind him with a large shotgun pointed at his posterior.

Everyone else will be giving horrendous reviews, but it will still fill theatres because of the masses of shills. No one on BWW will try to get the shills to go away, because the shills are raving about a show featuring THEM, and who would complain about that?