The Fairfax Revolution

[Kiren Brockett]

Okay, people. I is has paranoid parents who think this obvious spoof of the French Revolution could get me expelled or arrested or thrown in an asylum (where I would proceed to write a play about Imara writing a play about me, of course) so this story is down until summer. Yuck.

Seriously, I'm not deranged. Nor is this story, no matter what Kane says. I don't condone school violence, and all the teachers and students mentioned in the story that is no longer up are super spiffy people. This is an allegory. Do I make myself clear, fictional lunatic school board?

[Kiren Brockett]

Long, yes. Many of these names are fake. If you want your name altered, tell me.

This list now altered

Renaud Rudé is Nemo.
Kiren Brockett is... duh. Me.
Emmaline Euler is Schmergo.
Alex Fitzpatrick is Enigma.
Haley Simpkiss is Frik.
Sam Samuels is Vam and Joe Samuels is Demon.
Wendy Harris is Wickedgrl.
Morgana Prevot is Twi.
Keith Guillaume is Kane.
Kathy Gates is Kloud.
Brandon is Xero and Zacques-Pierre is Zim.

The rest should be pretty clear. Or unclear, meaning you don't know these people at all.

[Schmergo]

*Raises hand* I don't like that name bery much... I think I'm too sick of it because everyone says it should be my name. I'm not sure what my name should be, though. Maybe Emma?

Also, I think Zim should be Zacques Pierre, because... Jacques Pierre Brissot was in charge of the Girondins, and it would be FUNNY. Also, the first time I talked to Xim, I told him he should change his name to Zacques (utterly freaking him out).

At first, I was really upset that you weren't writing the story anymore, but then I realized that the school year's almost over, and in that time you can PLAN and make the story even better! WHOOT!

[Aku is Lazy]

Well, it was April Watson, so I specifically avoided 'Emma'.

Zacques Pierre may be the most amazing thing ever.

Who says I'm not still writing it? You people just can't see it yet... *smirk* They didn't exactly say I couldn't write the story, just that I couldn't share the summary. Hehehe.

[Schmergo]

Wait, why not use my real last name in your story? Xim gets his... if you're changin' my first name, you may as well use the same last name. *Shrug*

'Watson' makes me think of Sherlock Holmes... which isn't entirely bad, but Watson himself is a bit spineless and boring.

[theaceofspades]

this is why We don't like when you do story's with us in it Aku

[Schmergo]

I thought we didn't like it because we all died?

[Heidi Girl]

Just a quick thing, if by Fairfax you mean Virginia, and that's where you live, I've actually probably met you guys before, or I have a friend who has, big military presence there, so every single person I know has been there before. And Schmergo, if you don't want to be named April, how about Giorgi?
Peace out (I like that phrase today,)
- H.G.

[Nonlogged in Aku]

Heidi, that is eerie... but I suppose you're allowed to guess that, since I guessed what island you lived on.

Any names in particular?

Anyway, the Revolution gets posted in five (three, sir!) three days. Be happy. Be very afraid.

[Heidi Girl]

Depending on what school you go to, you've probably met, or at least heard of my cousin. He just transferred back from this school named Boys Town, he's on the wrestling team, and hasn't ever lost a match, if I remember right. He looks philipino, because his mom is from there (note, I'm related to his dad, not his mom). And since I haven't really seen him for several years, I don't know what else to say.
- H.G.
P.S. If you know him and happen to not like him, let me add that I'm nothing like my cousin, so don't judge me based on him.

[Schmergo]

Well, we don't live in Fairfax City, just Fairfax County, so the chance that we know you or your cousin is pretty slim, because that is one big place. But it's still really, really cool... and a little bit eerie! It would be pretty awesome if you'd met me in real life (though less awesome if you hated me, teehee).

[Kiren Brockett]

The FCPS situation is growing dangerous—the school board has been making a series of stupid decisions concerning the school budgets, the students are getting angry, and many of the lower teachers are siding with students against the school board. The situation comes to a head when the lunatic school board fires Jack Necker, the new (and sane) treasurer, whose budget plan included fixing dilapidated schools instead of buying large TVs.

Disgusted by this, a sophomore named Emmaline Euler jumps on a cafeteria table and delivers a moving speech. Inspired, the students of West Springfield, led by Sam Samuels, storm the classrooms and storage closets for potential weapons. Some bloodshed ensues, and Mr. James and Mrs. Spatcher are killed defending the PE storeroom. Seven students are freed from the principal’s office, including one Latin student dressed as Julius Caesar who refused to break character in Geometry. Imara Chew has just been sent home for wearing a shirt that was cut too low, and thus misses being liberated.

Meanwhile, a group of students are out on the tennis courts with poster board and sharpies, finishing off a petition (Renaud Rudé’s idea, led by Keith Guillaume) to the school board regarding student rights. When news of the revolution reaches them, they speedily change their petition to a new student constitution, and declare West Springfield the meeting place of a new government called the “Grand Assembly.”

The Board of Education officials agree to meet with the Assembly, but while the debate rages, other schools follow WS’s example. The board is forced to retreat as all of Fairfax County joins the new revolutionary state, with WS as its capital. Keith Guillaume is appointed temporary governor of WS and the principal is torn apart by a mob of hysterical students.

Surrounding counties quickly attempt to squash any notion of rebellion in their own schools. Rioting students nationwide make it impossible for the unbalanced government to suppress the revolution with military force.

A mob led by Morgana Prevot and Molly Smith attacks the school board’s current hideout and drags them back to West Springfield, singing a slightly altered version of “Kill the Zombies.”

The new Grand Assembly of the Fairfax County Republic has its first meeting on a Thursday. The schools have all elected representatives and sent them to WS to make laws for the Republic. The whole teaching institution is quickly disbanded, and all Fairfax citizens are declared equal. Teachers who helped the revolution are celebrated, but those who did not are taken in for questioning. Some are executed as traitors with a guillotine constructed and refined by Renaud, and placed in the center of the football field. The Assembly claims the teachers’ salaries to fund the Republic. Many teachers are outraged, and animosity between the two groups increases.

Many groups of students are prominent in the Assembly, but one political party, the Peeps, quickly rises to the front. Led by Kiren Brockett, the sarcastic admin of popular revolutionary website, the Crow’s Nest, Emmaline, a hero for beginning the revolution, Renaud, weapon designer and logistician, and, as a Boy Scout, the closest thing the Republic has to a doctor, and Morgana Prevot, the loud, offensive champion of the underdog. The Fairfax Guard, a dedicated militia, is formed, with Sam at the head.

The Assembly also soon changes its name to the Convention, due to connections with school assemblies.

The issue arises of whether or not to guillotine Leroy Lewis and Mary Anthony, chair and vice chair of the school board, who used the education funding to go on vacations. The Peeps begin to split into two distinct groups: the moderate Percontins, led by Zacques-Pierre Perconti and Molly Smith, who want to compromise with the government and avoid bloodshed, and the radical Talons. A new Talon power emerges with the trio of honorable and unassuming Alex Fitzpatrick, calm and persuasive Kathy Gates, and cold-blooded and stoic Haley Simpkiss. The Assembly sides with them, and the public execution occurs the following day.

The Convention sends representatives on mission to the borders of the county to combat pockets of teacher uprising. Kathy proves herself a wise and peaceful leader at Newington Elementary School, while Kellee Farris goes overboard with violence and teacher persecution at Vienna Middle School.

Shortly after Lewis and Anthony are executed, Morgana suggests the formation of the Student Council, a panel of students to deal swiftly with traitors to the Republic. The idea is received well, and Morgana, DJC, and Joe, among others, sit on the first Council.

As September, which would usually herald the start of a new school year, approaches, some students get a little stir-crazy. Kiren posts a Crow’s Nest rant about the Council being too moderate, and it leads to a heated debate. The debate becomes a massacre as a couple hundred students decide to murder the teachers and students currently waiting for trial. Kiren is blamed for the event, but the Council quickly clears her. Instead, they somehow manage to convict the Percontins. After a quick trial, they are executed. This comes as a shock to Emmaline, Morgana, Brandon Sodhi, and other Talons, and they begin to reconsider many of their opinions.

As the month comes to a close, the guillotine in the center of the field is constantly working, operated by Chloe Patterson, and the bleachers are often full of cheering students. Occasionally, important heads are displayed on the football goalposts. Jay Morrison writes a play glorifying the revolution, and Mike Yonkers becomes a military hero after protecting the Convention from a surprise attack.

Just when it seems all is well, the Republic is dealt two sharp blows. Maryland declares war on Fairfax County Republic, and sends in the entire Naval Academy graduating class to fight the Fairfax Guard. The Convention is forced to institute a draft to replace Sam’s rapidly depleting forces. Then, a young Marylander named Sylvie Prouvaire, who blames the Crow’s Nest for the violence, stabs Kiren in the heart just as she posts a list of Maryland conspirators. The nation is horrified. Cristian Benavides takes over the Crow’s Nest, and Emmaline, Ashveen Chandansingh, and Steffen Waldrop use propaganda to make Kiren into a revolutionary martyr. Ashveen creates a slightly altered dramatic manga image of her death scene. Sylvie is executed, which further enrages Maryland.

Alex, who was long endorsed and defended by Kiren’s website, is now accused of being a tyrant by other factions. Enthusiastic Bri Lau and quiet, organized, and loyal Joe Samuels, the younger Talons, take a more active political role to keep chaos from breaking out. Steffen, too, gains power, as he negotiates with other Virginia counties for military aid. Meanwhile, Kellee burns Vienna Middle School to the ground after defeating the teacher rebels. She starts a giant bonfire, torching thousands of graded papers in a ceremony to the “Goddess of Autonomy.” The Talons are horrified.

Cristian’s crude and angry writing style earns him many enemies. He is executed, along with DJC, a prominent member who the Council he recently left found a little too outspoken. Alex is offered the now open spot, and he reluctantly accepts, just as power is centralized around the Council. Former allies of Alex’s faction, Brandon and Keith, object to what they see as a bid for more power, and speak out against the Talons. They are soon beheaded. Keith dies bravely and becomes something of a martyr for moderates, while Brandon escapes the scaffold, only to be hit by a car on Rolling Road.

Imara Chew is sent to an asylum. She is one part of a pornographic-fanfic-writing trio, the other two being Haley and Kellee. Haley’s writing will be seen as great literature by future generations, while Imara’s will just be considered smut, and Kellee’s will be lost to the world.

The more moderate group of Talons, now known as the Morganists, led by Morgana and Emmaline, begin a campaign against Alex and his followers. Joe and Kathy provide a stunning defense, and the fickle mob begins to turn on the Morganists instead. Emmaline starts another website, the New Chandelier, originally merely a section of the Crow’s Nest, but a competitor before long. Alex tries to keep the Council from sentencing the Morganists, but after Morgana insults his cherished values, and Emmaline reminds everyone of the song he sang in the sixth grade musical, he leaves them to their fates. Morgana, Emmaline, and David Clark are sent to the scaffold, along with Jay, who was implicated in an embezzlement scam. Renaud flees Fairfax for North Carolina.

Alex, in an attempt to unify the Republic, tries to make the Philosophy of Live Fish the national religion, holding a huge Abraham Lincoln Appreciation Day festival. This does not help him at all, as those of other religions object, and followers of the Philosophy believe he is trying to take Keith’s place as High Priest. Kellee is particularly irate. The beheadings continue. Mrs. Clayton is guillotined for casually saying, “a fig for the nation” and Erin Cafferky is arrested for serving Kool-Aid to a regiment of the Fairfax Guard, who then proceeded to come down with food poisoning. Kathy breaks her knee while playing soccer, and must get around on crutches.

Wendy Harris, Catherine Grizzle, Steffen, and Kellee pass a motion labeling the Talons as outlaws. The Talons lock themselves in a West Springfield elevator before they are caught, and Alex, Kathy, and Bri attempt to reason with the Convention while Sam holds the door. However, they break in by using a tumbling mat as a battering ram. Bri and Sam successfully run to the end of the hallway and fling themselves out the window. Alex tries to do the same, but merely hits his jaw on the window sill, shattering it. The mob has no pity for him, nor for crutch-bound Kathy, who they push down the stairs.

The Talons are executed the next morning, before a cheering crowd. Most of them quiver in fear and pain as they walk or are dragged across the field, but Haley is perfectly calm. She only remarks to Chloe, the executioner, “I knew I would die before I turned seventeen.”

The Crow’s Nest is shut down by nightfall, and the representatives who called for the Talons’ deaths establish a government called the Student Directory. Inefficient and corrupt, their greatest achievement in two years (2010-2011) is to put out a national yearbook. The Directory stands until Mike Yonkers leads a military coup, declares himself Emperor, and conquers half of the East Coast. Finally, he is defeated by a combination of the harsh Florida summer, and UN troops. He is exiled to Puerto Rico, but returns, only to be defeated once and for all by an Air Force commander, Sabastian Knott. And so, the Revolution is no more.

(This may have typos, and it's kind of incomplete. Stupid computer.)

[Schmergo]

Aku, I already read this, but I love it. It's terribly clever... ooh, and I get the mathematician's last name. Now that's irony for you. Who was Sebastian Knott again? Oh, incidentally, I can't read this without thinking of Thanquol trying to read it... oh, the memories.

I especially like: Ashveen's dramatically altered manga of your death scene (also sounds like a DJC-ish thing to do), Imara's shirt, Mo being 'the loud, offensive champion of the underdog,' Peeps as a political party (as opposed to marshmallow birds or vampires with STDs), the SGA's hilarious names, Xim as 'moderate' (I know, I know, he keeps insisting he's a moderate in real life as well, like any good fascist, I mean, Politician, and I'm allowed to say that because I'm a Republican as well), the Percontins' execution coming as a shock to me, Jay's play, SYLVIE PROUVAIRE (that's just funny), the porno fanfic of our local crazed girls, my New Chandelier accusing Alex of singing about his coonskin cap, Erin's bad cool-aid, morbid Haley, and Mike manning up and taking over the world! WHOOT!

Okay, that was basically the whole story... yeah...

[Kiren Brockett]

;D

Thanksmuch. (Yes, it's one word.)

Yeah, now, every time I read this, I hear it in a James Earl Jones voice and/or Thanquol's voice. Which is odd, because I usually hear things I've written in a British accent.

[Schmergo]

My stories are usually read by Tim Curry in my mind. ^_^