Post by mousemaylikecheese on Jan 15, 2009 17:29:12 GMT -5
Or how Potter fainted and Voldy got the girl.
(Improvised French for "I am a delusion" I don't speak French at all. This has nothing to do with the seventh book, seriously. Rather OOC, and possibly quite badly written)
Harry finally dropped out of the trapdoor into what he was quite sure was Voldemort's hideout, eager to finally once and for all defeat Voldemort.
Cowardly, the evil wizard stared at him.
"Tom Marvolo Riddle, I have come to finally deal out justice." Harry exclaimed, striking a magnificent pose and pausing to make sure that if any paparazzi were around they would have a good photo op. He hoped that line was good enough.
"No, no!" exclaimed the dark wizard, cowering and slouching, slinking toward a delapidated armchair. "He did it!" he said, triumphantly, and with a great deal of shaking, pointing towards the other side of the room. Harry could see only a bookcase full of books.
"What's this?" asked Ron, convieniently ignoring the fact that Harry might be facing a deadly opponient and dropping in. "You-Know-Who likes 'The Adventures of Marvin the Muggle'?"
"Don't call it that! That's an important work of literature!"
"It seems to be a Death Eater code." commented Charlie, dropping in and examining the book Ron had pulled out of the shelf.
"Accio sssssssssssssss..." said Voldemort weakly. A purplish paperback, rather worn, with what seemed to be stars behind the title appeared in his hand. He looked at it with puzzlement. "This isn't what I wanted. I want..."
"What do you want with that?" asked Severus Snape, apparating into the room.
"You can't do that! You can't apparate into here!" Ron exclaimed, pointing a finger at the former potions master.
"Oh. Thank you. Were you reading this? What does elen mean?" asked Voldemort of the questionably loyal Death Eater.
"Do you expect me to memorize the glossary?" asked Snape, looking askew at Voldemort.
"You know everything!" exclaimed Voldemort, pointing at Severus Snape after handing the book back. "You were the one that organized it all. I wish I didn't have to murder any more, but you hold my strings."
"What?" asked Snape, bewildered, taking the book, and opening to a page within and proceding to study it closely.
"You orchestrated everything! I want to escape, but I couldn't possibly murder you!" Voldemort burst into tears, then flung himself at Snape's feet and clung to his leg.
Charlie mouthed something to Ron. (*completely irrelevant digression: I thought for a moment that I'd gone off my rails and typed something about the drunkard clothing store/actor/Vetinari impersonator. Thank you for reading this fic.)
Snape, rather nervously and stiffly, crouched and patted Voldemort on the shoulder. "There, there." he said mechanically.
But Voldemort only said "Master, master, I really can't stand to murder anyone else!" He then proceeded to throw his arms around Snape and bury his head in Snape's shoulder. It was at this point that Harry noticed that Snape was wearing Muggle clothing and then promptly fainted.
"He's dead!" exclaimed Voldemort in horror, but the two present Weasley brothers quickly fled the scene.
"I don't think he's dead, Tom" said Snape gently.
"Oh." said Voldemort. "Why did you want me to kill everyone? I don't hate muggles!"
"Well, then, you don't have to kill anyone." Snape replied awkwardly.
"I wish you hadn't made me kill anyone." Voldemort told him.
"I, uh, didn't..." Snape muttered.
Voldemort shrugged.
"What in the name of Scotland is going on? What happened to Harry?" asked Minerva McGonagall, apparating into the room.
"I think he's not dead." the erstwhile dark mastermind said brightly, approaching her.
"What happened to him?"
"Aren't you concerned about me, Minerva? Aren't you?" Voldemort asked childishly.
"Oh." said Minerva, looking at Severus Snape as if for an explanation.
TBC...
(Improvised French for "I am a delusion" I don't speak French at all. This has nothing to do with the seventh book, seriously. Rather OOC, and possibly quite badly written)
Harry finally dropped out of the trapdoor into what he was quite sure was Voldemort's hideout, eager to finally once and for all defeat Voldemort.
Cowardly, the evil wizard stared at him.
"Tom Marvolo Riddle, I have come to finally deal out justice." Harry exclaimed, striking a magnificent pose and pausing to make sure that if any paparazzi were around they would have a good photo op. He hoped that line was good enough.
"No, no!" exclaimed the dark wizard, cowering and slouching, slinking toward a delapidated armchair. "He did it!" he said, triumphantly, and with a great deal of shaking, pointing towards the other side of the room. Harry could see only a bookcase full of books.
"What's this?" asked Ron, convieniently ignoring the fact that Harry might be facing a deadly opponient and dropping in. "You-Know-Who likes 'The Adventures of Marvin the Muggle'?"
"Don't call it that! That's an important work of literature!"
"It seems to be a Death Eater code." commented Charlie, dropping in and examining the book Ron had pulled out of the shelf.
"Accio sssssssssssssss..." said Voldemort weakly. A purplish paperback, rather worn, with what seemed to be stars behind the title appeared in his hand. He looked at it with puzzlement. "This isn't what I wanted. I want..."
"What do you want with that?" asked Severus Snape, apparating into the room.
"You can't do that! You can't apparate into here!" Ron exclaimed, pointing a finger at the former potions master.
"Oh. Thank you. Were you reading this? What does elen mean?" asked Voldemort of the questionably loyal Death Eater.
"Do you expect me to memorize the glossary?" asked Snape, looking askew at Voldemort.
"You know everything!" exclaimed Voldemort, pointing at Severus Snape after handing the book back. "You were the one that organized it all. I wish I didn't have to murder any more, but you hold my strings."
"What?" asked Snape, bewildered, taking the book, and opening to a page within and proceding to study it closely.
"You orchestrated everything! I want to escape, but I couldn't possibly murder you!" Voldemort burst into tears, then flung himself at Snape's feet and clung to his leg.
Charlie mouthed something to Ron. (*completely irrelevant digression: I thought for a moment that I'd gone off my rails and typed something about the drunkard clothing store/actor/Vetinari impersonator. Thank you for reading this fic.)
Snape, rather nervously and stiffly, crouched and patted Voldemort on the shoulder. "There, there." he said mechanically.
But Voldemort only said "Master, master, I really can't stand to murder anyone else!" He then proceeded to throw his arms around Snape and bury his head in Snape's shoulder. It was at this point that Harry noticed that Snape was wearing Muggle clothing and then promptly fainted.
"He's dead!" exclaimed Voldemort in horror, but the two present Weasley brothers quickly fled the scene.
"I don't think he's dead, Tom" said Snape gently.
"Oh." said Voldemort. "Why did you want me to kill everyone? I don't hate muggles!"
"Well, then, you don't have to kill anyone." Snape replied awkwardly.
"I wish you hadn't made me kill anyone." Voldemort told him.
"I, uh, didn't..." Snape muttered.
Voldemort shrugged.
"What in the name of Scotland is going on? What happened to Harry?" asked Minerva McGonagall, apparating into the room.
"I think he's not dead." the erstwhile dark mastermind said brightly, approaching her.
"What happened to him?"
"Aren't you concerned about me, Minerva? Aren't you?" Voldemort asked childishly.
"Oh." said Minerva, looking at Severus Snape as if for an explanation.
TBC...