Post by Schmergo on Mar 20, 2008 10:43:24 GMT -5
I found these on the livejournal of McTabby. These are all genuine summaries of fanfictions. Read, enjoy, and never write anything like this!
But werewolves turn into vampires after death...
Two duelists meet in the dead of night. On the battleground, they stand, awaiting the dance fever to overtake them.
Draco Malfoy is 17...nothing wrong with that, right? Well, there is. Apparently in his family there is a slight fluke, and in his 7th year at Hogwarts he finds himself being in heat, and every girl on him like a pack of dogs on a three legged cat... all except Hermione.
Rated R for the obvious reasons. Featuring Snape. Do not read if you are offended by such things.
Two inseparable Gryffindors. One perfect springtime day. Candy, flowers, and a beautiful sunset. True love? Of course! However, this is 1927, and they are both girls, so the thought doesn't occur to them...
Neville/Ginny pre-het.
After the Fourth Year, emotions whirlwind through Harry as he deals with Cedric's death, falls in love with Colin, and then Draco. All the while changing his perception of Good and Evil and his look from Dork to Goth.
Ginny ponders about how she would go about eating Harry's soul.
Severus Snape contemplates alone in his quarters. He watches a spider scuttle along the floor and makes friends with it.
Sir Elton John and Draco Malfoy combine to create the ultimate window to Draco's soul.
Not an original plot. I needed something to write and came to this: Ginny was flying during Herbology (while her teacher was off having a torrid affair), something that relaxes her.
Over in Seriphos live the hoodwinks, there is a very special hoodwink named Selene. What will happen when Voldemort has plans for her?
If you like the breath knocked out of your lungs, and salt water stains to veil your eyes, and the swollen heart of an addict prisoner to love throbbing in your chest, then please, proceed.
Ediciustastnihsiht is spelled backwackwards to avoid spoilers.
Harry is in Dumbledore's office when Fawkes mindspeaks to him. Fawkes tells Harry to become an Animagus.
Like all great wizarding authors, Ron has decided that he needs grow a beard.
Painful memories affect us in ways we can't even imagine. For Ginny Weasley, they are a daily way of life. One especially sticks out in her mind: Tom's unexplainable hatred of wet hair. Unable to deal this memory any longer, she flees Gryffindor Tower in an attempt to escape the pain through a sucidial free-fall from an Astromony Tower, only to fall a murder by the hands of Tom himself.
Harry's celebrating his fifth birthday the same as always. A gift from Hagrid, Ron, Hermoine, and a letter from Sirius.
Ginny, sitting on a nearby tree, reflects on Draco's short speech as a ghost.
After all, who can resist a pair of staring violet eyes?
Elsarinxzarlas Calsarracktik (Xzar Cal for short) is a student going to Hogwarts in Harrys First year.
Harry loves Hermione's toes.
She sings and smiles and acts very much like the kind of girl ugly girls hate.
Snape is sent to retrieve Hermione only to discover her a bleached cropped-haired pregnant junkie living on the Gold Coast of Australia. From there things go horribly, horribly wrong.
Voldemort's alien master has come, leading the magically resistant Cyberians to invade the world.
Watch Harry and Jessie's love develop and become the greatest love story EVER.
This is a fanfic between Snape's lust for his android. Snape is age 49 and this android is male shaped and atomically correct.
“Snape.” He uttered in wondrous tones, savouring the rich consonant of the word...
Ever wonder why Snape is Snape?
Snape and farts don't mix.
Snapes supermodel girlfrien
Us. I’ve started to call my miasma and I an ‘us’. I tried to tell myself for the longest time that she was nothing but a simple sweet cloud of delicious poison. I am the serpent after all, poison doesn’t hurt me.
Usual story .. Hermione comes back after summer perfect and gorgeous, a hunky Draco is instantly smitten and his spine turns to gloop.
Does the Malfoy's pet blue wolf know more than she lets on?
Draco corners Ginny with a muffin cause he doesn't think she's eating right, Ginny refuses to eat it... romance develops.
Harry discovers that McGonagall has been molesting Hermione since their second year.
harry goes to prostitute collage to train to become a pimp
Hermione breaks Ron's heart right after he sticks his foot in his mouth.
Not your average 'Snape saves the Dursley's' story.
Rachel wasn't even raised on the same planet, but grew up as a Jedi under her grandmother's guidance, and Harry's world is turned upside-down.
DM/HG, Lucius is abuseful, kind of suspenseful (the story, not Lucius)...
For Draco's 7th birthday, he wants his very own boy.
Mega Percy ouchies
mermaid girl comes to hogwarts, sorted into 2 houses!
Now we join Harry in heaven, and watch him through his Mother's Day escapades.
She has a scar on her forehead shaped like a slytherin, but, it lights up when she's mean or angry.
Stuff happens. Well, stuff happens in every story. It's the cardinal rule of stuff!
(THE SUPENUSE!!!0.0 IT'S MIND BOOGLEING!!!)
Whilst writing a letter to Remus, Sirius recalls when Remus wore glitter, and he fell head over heels.
As a punishment for his disloyalty to Voldemort Snape is castrated. He retreats to the Forbidden Forest.
Featuring Blind!Draco, Deaf!Harry and Orange!Snape
To every girl that's ever wanted to be kissed by Draco Malfoy with your last breath. And die by the hands of him.
Harry finds out that he's the last of an extinct race. One night he accidentally mates with Draco Malfoy.
But what is up with his Vladimir guy?
Harry decides to be a vegetarian because of an accident that occured dealing with Ron and a pig
For two years, there has been no Harry Potter, only Lord Harold, the man who did what Voldemort never did.
Harry Potter is finally captured by the Dark Lord - but what does this entail for him? And why does Voldemort keep looking at him that way?
this is a story. A teary story in which you'd cry afterwards. You'll be so happy and you'll like it! It's a story about words and chickens
Voldemort has lost his unmentionables in his quest for immortality, but he finds himself in need of an heir.
Voldermort left someone he loved in a freezer machine before he started his killing sprees and now she is olny 15.
What if a hypnotizing monster apires?
Draco Malfoy is one arrogant, obnoxious sophomore who meets a bushy beauty, Hermione Granger at American University's boys' comfort room.
harry finds out that barney is telling all the little kids not to go to hogwarts if they get an invite. what is the big purple dinosaur hiding? who is it really?
Harry, pregnant, dying, encounters one of his ancestors.
I don't know what this is about, read it, cos I'm pretty.
Life isn't a pretty pink flowerbed, people. It's a freakin bed of blood and dead stuff, along with slash, violence, and bad language.
Narcissa, the goddess of beauty, was offended by a mortal named Harry. She then sent her son Draco, god of love, to seek revenge.
When Ginny was accidentally zapped by a spell that turned her into an elf some crazy things started happening, including a marriage that no one, not even the groom could get out of by law of 'the necklace'.
Yes that's right. The greasy,grumpy,snappy, nearing potions master of Hogwarts school of which craft and wizardry is a veela. And he's never been able to find his mate!
A different look on Lucius Malfoy's teen years; Instead of a chick magnet, he's awkward! Imagine that. The change from a gangly, glasses-wearing teen, to an evil, murderous hottie...
Brindi Lin Holliday Kariell was born naturaly, like most children are, except for the part about being burried six feet underground three days before she was born. A full prologue inside.
Harry has turned hot over the years, and into a God.
Hermione wants Draco badly, she's desperate and kisses him.
Draco's frightened and turns gay just for the cause.
love love love and babies!
Man, i'm on FIRE!!!!
Magic is used by underage wizards (at no consequence) and a search ensues, resulting in Bill, Charlie and Harry finding Ginny naked with a hedgehog. Lupin and Hermione are suspected.
Snape tutors student, student and Snape get on each other's nerves, crazy bow-chicka-bow-bow making out ensues.
What if all veela we'ren't silvery? What if Harry and other students at Hogwarts were Veela too?
What if Emperor Draco is turned into a llama by his evil advisor Pansy and her helper Blaise?
Young, smart, and a genius, Artemis Riddle is transferred.
But werewolves turn into vampires after death...
Two duelists meet in the dead of night. On the battleground, they stand, awaiting the dance fever to overtake them.
Draco Malfoy is 17...nothing wrong with that, right? Well, there is. Apparently in his family there is a slight fluke, and in his 7th year at Hogwarts he finds himself being in heat, and every girl on him like a pack of dogs on a three legged cat... all except Hermione.
Rated R for the obvious reasons. Featuring Snape. Do not read if you are offended by such things.
Two inseparable Gryffindors. One perfect springtime day. Candy, flowers, and a beautiful sunset. True love? Of course! However, this is 1927, and they are both girls, so the thought doesn't occur to them...
Neville/Ginny pre-het.
After the Fourth Year, emotions whirlwind through Harry as he deals with Cedric's death, falls in love with Colin, and then Draco. All the while changing his perception of Good and Evil and his look from Dork to Goth.
Ginny ponders about how she would go about eating Harry's soul.
Severus Snape contemplates alone in his quarters. He watches a spider scuttle along the floor and makes friends with it.
Sir Elton John and Draco Malfoy combine to create the ultimate window to Draco's soul.
Not an original plot. I needed something to write and came to this: Ginny was flying during Herbology (while her teacher was off having a torrid affair), something that relaxes her.
Over in Seriphos live the hoodwinks, there is a very special hoodwink named Selene. What will happen when Voldemort has plans for her?
If you like the breath knocked out of your lungs, and salt water stains to veil your eyes, and the swollen heart of an addict prisoner to love throbbing in your chest, then please, proceed.
Ediciustastnihsiht is spelled backwackwards to avoid spoilers.
Harry is in Dumbledore's office when Fawkes mindspeaks to him. Fawkes tells Harry to become an Animagus.
Like all great wizarding authors, Ron has decided that he needs grow a beard.
Painful memories affect us in ways we can't even imagine. For Ginny Weasley, they are a daily way of life. One especially sticks out in her mind: Tom's unexplainable hatred of wet hair. Unable to deal this memory any longer, she flees Gryffindor Tower in an attempt to escape the pain through a sucidial free-fall from an Astromony Tower, only to fall a murder by the hands of Tom himself.
Harry's celebrating his fifth birthday the same as always. A gift from Hagrid, Ron, Hermoine, and a letter from Sirius.
Ginny, sitting on a nearby tree, reflects on Draco's short speech as a ghost.
After all, who can resist a pair of staring violet eyes?
Elsarinxzarlas Calsarracktik (Xzar Cal for short) is a student going to Hogwarts in Harrys First year.
Harry loves Hermione's toes.
She sings and smiles and acts very much like the kind of girl ugly girls hate.
Snape is sent to retrieve Hermione only to discover her a bleached cropped-haired pregnant junkie living on the Gold Coast of Australia. From there things go horribly, horribly wrong.
Voldemort's alien master has come, leading the magically resistant Cyberians to invade the world.
Watch Harry and Jessie's love develop and become the greatest love story EVER.
This is a fanfic between Snape's lust for his android. Snape is age 49 and this android is male shaped and atomically correct.
“Snape.” He uttered in wondrous tones, savouring the rich consonant of the word...
Ever wonder why Snape is Snape?
Snape and farts don't mix.
Snapes supermodel girlfrien
Us. I’ve started to call my miasma and I an ‘us’. I tried to tell myself for the longest time that she was nothing but a simple sweet cloud of delicious poison. I am the serpent after all, poison doesn’t hurt me.
Usual story .. Hermione comes back after summer perfect and gorgeous, a hunky Draco is instantly smitten and his spine turns to gloop.
Does the Malfoy's pet blue wolf know more than she lets on?
Draco corners Ginny with a muffin cause he doesn't think she's eating right, Ginny refuses to eat it... romance develops.
Harry discovers that McGonagall has been molesting Hermione since their second year.
harry goes to prostitute collage to train to become a pimp
Hermione breaks Ron's heart right after he sticks his foot in his mouth.
Not your average 'Snape saves the Dursley's' story.
Rachel wasn't even raised on the same planet, but grew up as a Jedi under her grandmother's guidance, and Harry's world is turned upside-down.
DM/HG, Lucius is abuseful, kind of suspenseful (the story, not Lucius)...
For Draco's 7th birthday, he wants his very own boy.
Mega Percy ouchies
mermaid girl comes to hogwarts, sorted into 2 houses!
Now we join Harry in heaven, and watch him through his Mother's Day escapades.
She has a scar on her forehead shaped like a slytherin, but, it lights up when she's mean or angry.
Stuff happens. Well, stuff happens in every story. It's the cardinal rule of stuff!
(THE SUPENUSE!!!0.0 IT'S MIND BOOGLEING!!!)
Whilst writing a letter to Remus, Sirius recalls when Remus wore glitter, and he fell head over heels.
As a punishment for his disloyalty to Voldemort Snape is castrated. He retreats to the Forbidden Forest.
Featuring Blind!Draco, Deaf!Harry and Orange!Snape
To every girl that's ever wanted to be kissed by Draco Malfoy with your last breath. And die by the hands of him.
Harry finds out that he's the last of an extinct race. One night he accidentally mates with Draco Malfoy.
But what is up with his Vladimir guy?
Harry decides to be a vegetarian because of an accident that occured dealing with Ron and a pig
For two years, there has been no Harry Potter, only Lord Harold, the man who did what Voldemort never did.
Harry Potter is finally captured by the Dark Lord - but what does this entail for him? And why does Voldemort keep looking at him that way?
this is a story. A teary story in which you'd cry afterwards. You'll be so happy and you'll like it! It's a story about words and chickens
Voldemort has lost his unmentionables in his quest for immortality, but he finds himself in need of an heir.
Voldermort left someone he loved in a freezer machine before he started his killing sprees and now she is olny 15.
What if a hypnotizing monster apires?
Draco Malfoy is one arrogant, obnoxious sophomore who meets a bushy beauty, Hermione Granger at American University's boys' comfort room.
harry finds out that barney is telling all the little kids not to go to hogwarts if they get an invite. what is the big purple dinosaur hiding? who is it really?
Harry, pregnant, dying, encounters one of his ancestors.
I don't know what this is about, read it, cos I'm pretty.
Life isn't a pretty pink flowerbed, people. It's a freakin bed of blood and dead stuff, along with slash, violence, and bad language.
Narcissa, the goddess of beauty, was offended by a mortal named Harry. She then sent her son Draco, god of love, to seek revenge.
When Ginny was accidentally zapped by a spell that turned her into an elf some crazy things started happening, including a marriage that no one, not even the groom could get out of by law of 'the necklace'.
Yes that's right. The greasy,grumpy,snappy, nearing potions master of Hogwarts school of which craft and wizardry is a veela. And he's never been able to find his mate!
A different look on Lucius Malfoy's teen years; Instead of a chick magnet, he's awkward! Imagine that. The change from a gangly, glasses-wearing teen, to an evil, murderous hottie...
Brindi Lin Holliday Kariell was born naturaly, like most children are, except for the part about being burried six feet underground three days before she was born. A full prologue inside.
Harry has turned hot over the years, and into a God.
Hermione wants Draco badly, she's desperate and kisses him.
Draco's frightened and turns gay just for the cause.
love love love and babies!
Man, i'm on FIRE!!!!
Magic is used by underage wizards (at no consequence) and a search ensues, resulting in Bill, Charlie and Harry finding Ginny naked with a hedgehog. Lupin and Hermione are suspected.
Snape tutors student, student and Snape get on each other's nerves, crazy bow-chicka-bow-bow making out ensues.
What if all veela we'ren't silvery? What if Harry and other students at Hogwarts were Veela too?
What if Emperor Draco is turned into a llama by his evil advisor Pansy and her helper Blaise?
Young, smart, and a genius, Artemis Riddle is transferred.
I don't think I'll be able to sleep tonight...
It was just the most random thing I could think of.